Something Action - Packed

Hello again, dear readers. A little catching up for you.

In a galaxy far, far away, there was a high school band. This band featured a star flutist named Lern Dern.  Lern Dern was so magnificent, they had to chair everybody to see just how un-majestic they were in comparison. Anyhoo, it is chairing day, and Lern is there. Lern appears very nervous, with shaky hands and sweaty palms and everything.  The Evil Stand - In Band Director (our usual director had heart surgery. Dios mio.) cruelly calls on Lern Dern to play first, knowing she'd be too nervous to play anything comprehensible. However, all of this is a façade. Lern Dern has trained long and hard to become a fledi (flute Jedi) and is only using her nervousness to deceive Mr. Evil Stand-In Director into false confidence. He smiles, revealing his metallic brass teeth, and the blood of woodwind before Lern Dern. Bracing herself for a battle of epic proportions, Lern inhaled a low deep breath. Long silence stretched around the room, suffocating like a cobra. However, the dreaded Silence And General Awkwardness of chairing was no match for Lern Dern. Inaudibly pressing the keys,  Lern Dern's flute transformed into a glowing lightsaber. In one fluid motion, a perfectly tuned high note slices through the dreaded Silence And General Awkwardness of chairing.  Mr. Evil Stand- In Band Director cancelled. Suddenly, the flute part from the Star Spangled Banner emerges from behind the stand-in director.  Of course he had something up his sleeves too, thought Lern Dern. Normally, the flute part from the Start Spangled Banner would be a small inconvenience for a trained fledi, but battling it solo... Lern Dern had to ace this chairing.  Making a fierce face, she expertly controlled her emberachure, dining valuable blows into the monster. More angered than hurt, the beast roared louder than a plane engine. With quick slices from expert fingering, the behemoth was on its last legs. Realizing what she had to do, Lern threw her flute into the wiry teeth of the stand-in director.  She then desperately sprinted to safety with the surviving members of the flute section.  The beast, seeing the bright glow of the flute lightsaber, charged at the evil director,  finishing them both off in a spectacular explosion.

So the flutes chaired. I went first.  And I'm pretty sure I did pretty well.